I am so lonely.

I feel like all I do now is cry. Ever since the day Brice dropped me off I have been only depressed. Whenever I am alone it hits me the most. I may seem happy whenever I am hanging out with people but once that ends the tears just start coming. The worse part about it is I have no one to take my mind off of my sadness. My mom is gone, all my friends are back at home which is three hours away, all I am with right now are guys which make it worse. My life right now just sucks. Honestly the thought of moving to my dads in Colorado has come to mind a couple of times because I know I will ne'er be alone, a job is already waiting for me, and I would be with Noah again. But the one thing that sucks is that I would NEVER see Brice. I would be able to see my mom because on custody issue you have to visit on holidays but she would want me all to herself and I probably wouldn't be able to drive to Atalanta. Why can't this year just go ahead and end so I can live with Brice just the two of us with nothing in between us like a five hour drive, or school, or his job. I just hate being away from him. Crying just seems like the only thing I can do anymore. And if I am not crying I have a blank face on and everyone always knows something is wrong with me. Today I went to beach just myself and my nook and I was so lonely. I know if Brice were with me he'd be happy to go with me and I would be happy together with him again. I know seeing him in between the year we have to live together will be good because I won't have to go without seeing him for that long but I also don't want it to come to an end and me be depressed again. Depression is a bitch. I am literally really close to just packing everything up and going to live with him now. I wish.